I’m flying out to Mozambique next week to visit friends I haven’t seen in at least two years – and I’ve known Kevin and Katja since college, which was roughly 6 years ago (and even more roughly, about 25 pounds ago). While I’ve packed on the equivalent of a mid-sized dog around my middle, Kevin is currently training for a marathon, and Katja – who has had a beautiful baby – looks gorgeously Finnish as always. No pressure…
So last week, I decided I’d try a 3-day Juice Cleanse.
Stop laughing. A food blogger CAN diet. We just hate life when we do.
Juicing is interesting, kinda fun, kinda different, and gosh darnit, I got to buy a new kitchen toy for the occasion. I was off to a promising start. Now, there are juicing zealots out there who take this very seriously. I am not one. I apologize in advance to those who are. I also can’t follow directions to save my life. Here’s my everywoman thoughts on enduring a week’s worth of juice. Yes, a week, because I just couldn’t drink all that juice in 3 days so I spaced it out with salads, almonds, whole fruit and veggie burgers. And the occasional beer. It’s wheat juice, okay?
The 12 Guts and Glories of Juicing
- Total cost for “3 days” of juicing ingredients: $100 (Price if I had bought a pre-packaged 3-day cleanse: $195)
- Body’s reaction to adding beets to *anything* – Expelling red, which is terrifying if you’ve forgotten you just had BEETS. Then you remember you had beets, and hope that’s all it is.
- Adding a clove of garlic to tomato juice may seem like a great idea – it isn’t. It’s overpowering. Avoid.
- Even if you really like ginger, 1-inch of ginger root is sufficient. Adds a kick, but doesn’t remove your sinuses.
- Believe the recipe when it says “remove seeds from jalapeno.”
- Resist the urge to experiment with recipes. However, parsley and celery surprisingly make just about everything better.
- Carrots, apple, and celery are amazing together. Adding ginger, even better. Who knew?
- Juicer juice is waaaay better, and entirely different, than store-bought juice. Accept no substitute.
- You will get tired of all juice after 3 days. Or before 3 days. And you will eat the ingredients whole with your bare hands and be happy with two fistfulls of raw spinach because at least it’s not JUICE!
- Your stomach will magically shrink, making your next week of healthy, balanced dieting much easier.
- In the end, it’s worth it.
- I never want to see juice again.
Here’s my favorite recipe from the week:
Apple-Carrot-Beet – from RebootwithJoe.com
- 2 apples
- 4 carrots
- 2 beets
- 6 swiss chard leaves
- 1” ginger root
Photo of a 3-Day Juice Cleanse worth of produce by WanderFood