In his debut novel, Another Roadside Attraction, Tom Robbins paints a candid picture of the Pacific Northwest’s notoriously dreary weather:
“…when it is not raining, still the gray is pervasive; the sun a little boiled potato in a stew of dirty dumplings; the fire and light and energy of the cosmos trapped somewhere far behind that impenetrable slugbelly sky.”
As a longtime resident of La Conner, Washington – a small fishing town north of Seattle – Robbins is no stranger to the damp day-to-day. Like Robbins, the infamously quirky personalities of his protagonists are often drawn to soggy climates – many of which possess intrinsic attachments to extreme weather patterns. But, unlike his fictional friends, Robbins cannot become pregnant during a thunderstorm (“Was it the lightning or the lover?”) or hunker down with The Bandaloop Doctors every time it rains. So, on a recent rainy afternoon, I asked myself: “What would Tom Robbins do?” Because with an average rate of one book every five years, he certainly doesn’t write until the sky turns blue.
Despite a solid minute of determined daydreaming, the question grew dusty and sulked slowly into the storage closet of my mind. The following day, in the midst of mild rain and half a dozen naked bodies, the answer came to me: Tom Robbins would be here, naked, at the Common Ground Wellness Center‘s outdoor bathhouse in Northeast Portland. He would be sitting in the hot waters of this swimsuit-optional soaking pool, enjoying the therapy jets and unintentionally creeping me out by gazing in my direction with a blank yet engaged stare. But, no, despite his overtly sexual prose, Tom would never violate the “safe and non-sexual environment” of Common Ground – he would merely be lost in deep literary thought. As the cold rain fell down and the hot sodium chloride steam rose up, Tom would be thinking of page 133 – 134 of Another Roadside Attraction where, he writes:
“…[The Zillers] strolled calmly and smoothly, their bodies perfectly relaxed. They did not hunch away from the rain but rather glided through it. They directed their faces to it and did not flinch as it drummed their cheeks. They almost reveled in it…They were not at odds with it, they did not deny it or combat it; they accepted it and went with it in harmony and ease.”
Yes, that is what Tom Robbins would be doing on a rainy Northwest day. So, in the spirit of W.W.T.R.D:
“I tried it myself. I relaxed my neck and shoulders and turned my gaze into the wet. I let it do to me what it would. Of course, it was not trying to do anything to me. What a silly notion. It was simply falling as rain should, and I a [wo]man, another phenomenon of nature, was sharing the space which it fell.”
And, oh, what a space it is. Rain or shine, the Common Ground Wellness Center provides a relaxing and rejuvenating environment – a magical courtyard of peace. For better or for worse, Common Ground is as unique and soft as the bodies it attracts. In addition to the outdoor soaking pool, CGWC also provides a dry cedar sauna, showers, and a sun and rain deck – all for a reasonable price. For thirty ($10), sixty ($14) or ninety ($18) minutes, you can tilt your head towards the sky and watch all your unresolved rivers flow into the bay of understanding. Like Activia for the mind, a stint at Common Ground will relax even the most congested cerebrum. CGWC encourages its guests to unwind in an environment of their choosing. While most hours are open to all genders, men only, women only, and trans/gender-queer hours are offered on a weekly and monthly basis with silent hours occurring from 10-11pm every evening. Regardless of when you arrive, I assure you that Common Ground rises far above any and every stigma surrounding bathhouses. It is clean. It is comfortable. It is asexual. The Tom Robbins scenario is the weirdest thing that has ever happened to me at the CGWC, and that, my friends, was one hundred percent self-inflicted.
So, the next time the weather tries to coop you up inside, make like Tom Robbins and revel in the rain at the CGWC. If a soak and sauna isn’t your thing, Common Ground also provides massages and body work, acupuncture, counseling, naturopathic medicine, and birth and family services. Enjoy.